1) I don't think it's unfair to the securely attached person to be in relationship to insecurely attached because they do not respond the same way to the stimulus. Protest behaviors simply do not have the same affect on someone who is securely attached. Often times a secretly attached person will be concerned and provide the support needed to calm the situation. Whereas an Avoidant will withdraw, leading to more protest behaviors.

That said, I am not attracted to those with a secure attachment. And I've found that it's very difficult to change who you are attracted to.