As a woman who started life fully desirous of the tradwife lifestyle, I'd like to answer your question sincerely. I believed going into marriage that my man would take care of me. I assumed he would work and provide financially, but also that he would help mold our children into responsible human beings. I believed we would work together to create a home and wealth.

What really happened was he was an extra child for me to clean up after, cook for, and attempt (unsuccessfully) to keep from doing permanent damage to our children.

He often played video games 12 hours per day. He called our daughter, Alyx, names like "ug-lyx" and our sons "f*g" and "r****d".

He contributed financially and financially only. He treated me like a piece of ass, available to meet his needs whenever he felt like it.

So I was completely disillusioned.

But even after that I still believed I had just picked badly. So I tried again.

This time I found one who was so controlling, I was basically asking for permission to do what I wanted to do in the day. He had isolated me from my friends and family - including my own children.

He cleaned and cooked. He took care of almost everything around the house. But the cost was too steep for me to pay.

I've had more relationships in my life than just those two, and each has included some major problems that were unlivable. So maybe at one time I thought having a man in my life would enhance my life in some way, but I no longer feel that.

It seems now, more like to have a man in my life means a drain on my physical, emotional, and mental resources without much in return.

I'm sure there are men out there who actively contribute in their relationships, while simultaneously not being abusive, but I haven't met one. And I refuse to look any longer.