Each relationship certainly has its own dynamic and its own agreements, I think I'm more talking about entering the relationship. Once some boundaries are established you need to abide by the agreements in place - but they do change over time. I guess I'm more trying to say it's like when the kids fight - you can't force your partner to do something they don't want to do - even if it's agreed upon. And instead of getting mad you need to realize that all you can control is your response to their behavior. Trying to get them to uphold the agreement is only going to end in stress and resentment, because we have no control over what our partner chooses to do or not do.