Funny how we tell them in articles like this what we want, and they tell us we don't know what we want as evidenced by this comment section.

They're hung up on actual physical fighting, when in actuality, for example, I am so in love with the man you describe here I can't think straight. And we've known each other for 9 years. The nuance missed by your commenters is that he defends me and us from anyone who would seek to do us harm - in today's world that has been exclusively psychological harm. He would never let someone say something negative about me - not even himself. And that includes times when we've been apart (due to mental health issues on my part).

I understand that most people haven't - and most likely won't ever experience the kind of love I've been blessed with, but I can assure you it exists and if we didn't just settle for the first person who pays attention to us, more of us might actually find it.

But you both have to be willing to grow. That's what is almost always lacking in every relationship. We look for convenience over self reflection. We wonder what they will offer us, instead of what we can offer them. Both partners have to be committed to a process of refinement because none of us have been prepared for this kind of love.

A love such as you describe doesn't just fall into our lap. We must tend to it as a garden and be willing to be vulnerable in ways that feel scary. In short, it is not for the faint of heart.