I agree with a lot of your points.

However, the question posed to potential dates isn't, and never has been, about abortion.

The question gets to the heart of how a man feels about women in general. If a man truly believes that women are lining up to have abortions in the third trimester of pregnancy, for no better reason than simply birth control, then he doesn't think much of women in general does he?

Thank you for your thoughtful response. I would consider this an amazing answer. It shows you actually understand the nuance and the ethical repercussions as well as simply just being aware of the issue in general. As I mentioned, most men parrot, "Abortion bad. Woman who have abortion bad." With no real understanding of the ramifications of creating laws around medical decisions.