I personally know dozens of men who are middle aged, ugly, fat, and happily paired off with women they met in their current physical shape.

It is not all about appearance, I assure you. Or money for that matter.

Women are looking for specific qualities - confidence, yes - but also kindness, sense of humor, emotional support. Someone who is interesting to talk to and engaging. Someone who is emotionally intelligent and willing to put some effort into growth - individually and as a couple.

It sounds like you've blamed your lack of success on your appearance to the point that you've neglected developing an attractive personality.

You do realize there are plenty of unattractive women, right? I suppose if you're a 4 and you're looking for a 10, you may not be able to make that work, but there are plenty of women in the same boat - believing they can't find partners because they aren't attractive enough.

Now if you're too busy with work, child rearing, and responsibilities around your parents (which would be understandable), that's one thing. If that's the case, admit to yourself you simply don't have time to dedicate to finding a partner. Then once your schedule has freed up you can try again, but stop playing the victim because that is truly unattractive.