I speak openly to my sons, hoping to build them into solid, independent people in general, but also so they might be good partners when the time comes.

Unfortunately their dad is not a great example, which I fear will dictate their actions within a marriage more than my words will. And obviously they have societal influences as well.

Hopefully, if I've done my job right, this experience will at least not leave them looking for a mommy in a wife, but rather a partner.

The one thing that has been absolutely amazing about them living under the same roof as their sister and their two nephews is seeing what parenting looks like, especially for a woman with an unhelpful partner. They have both said they want to wait (maybe indefinitely) to have children of their own. I feel this is a great decision and will lead to a better outcome if/when they do decide to marry and/or have a family.

I think many boys/men feel that they can contribute 30 seconds to the creation of a child followed by a bit of play time here and there and call it a day. I'm hoping my boys will see how much work it actually is and not have any delusions about how much they will be expected to contribute to their future households. I think just being self-aware enough to know that they are not ready right now is a great start.