Sex is a part of a relationship. Not the most important part, nor the least important part. Simply a part. And I think putting too much emphasis on it is detrimental for many reasons - the least of which is when one of you is not capable for whatever reason.

When men inevitably lose desire or experience ED, if that was the most important part of the relationship, he would feel as though he'd lost his worth.

It's no different for a woman. If a man puts too much emphasis on the bedroom a woman is made to feel like an object and once she can't do that "job" any longer (just had a baby for example), she is made to feel less than.

I was married briefly when I was 18 to an abusive man who was 30. He once told me that a man cannot rape his wife. He then told me that his first wife refused to give him oral sex after delivering their child. So of course he took what was "rightfully" his even though she'd had a full front to back episiotomy in labor.

This is obviously an extreme example, but I think it illustrates the problem with believing you are entitled to sex at any point in any relationship. And honestly just putting so much emphasis on it as though it's an actual physical "need" which it is not.

In the same vein, I believe a woman who degrades her husband for not being able to perform is causing irreparable damage, though clearly not as traumatizing as what some men do to women.