You make some good points, but you also highlight what women in general are complaining about. We don't want to gently nudge or remind you to clean up after yourself. By assuming that will be your partner's role, you are making them take on the role of mother for you. No woman wants that role. And from what I can tell, your habits may improve slightly in the initial phase of your relationship, but the changes aren't lasting. They don't call them "habits" for nothing.

I'm not saying you need to suddenly become a clean freak, but picking up after yourself right away is a life skill - one that everyone should learn BEFORE getting into a relationship. It's much easier to load your dish right after using it, or do a quick pick up of the living room before bed. ESPECIALLY when it's just you. If you aren't doing it now, I promise you won't suddenly become a different person then. And it's not her job to teach you how to adult.